


Admit It, One Day

by ivycross



Category: Star Trek: Mirror Universe, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Knifeplay, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-11
Updated: 2013-10-11
Packaged: 2017-12-29 02:48:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/999956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivycross/pseuds/ivycross
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An exchange between Mirrorverse Kirk and Spock. Something I wrote to take break from everything else I'm working on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Admit It, One Day

There is blood on the pillow, bright red and shameless for all to see. It's a vibrant green that will stain the sheets and the yeoman will wonder what goes on at night. There is no light, save for a handful of candles, some already burnt down to nothing, some whose flames still dance on. His dagger catch the light of the flames just so and it looks like the fire is dancing on the edge of the blade. The reflection catches Spock's eye for a moment and he lets it hold his gaze.

"Spock, look at me." The voice of his captain is a harsh whisper, full of petulant need. Turning his gaze back, Spock stares into Kirk's eyes and is mesmerized by how they glow in the candlelight.

Kirk smirks and pushes his knife into Spock's chest. When he pulls it back, there is thin green line buried among the dark curls. Spock looks down at it unmoved before his eye return to his captain.

His own blade goes to Kirk's neck and the gasp the man makes sends shivers up his spine. The smirk is now a grin as thick fingers gently move the knife up to full lips and Spock watches as a pink tongue flicks over the steel. He pulls the knife away hearing Kirk laugh softly.

The room around them reeks. It smells of blood, sweat and sex. Both of them are slick with bodily fluids and they grind against one another with ease.

"Spock," Kirk's voice pulls on the Vulcan's ears and Spock finds he cannot think straight. "You're awfully quiet tonight. Why is that?"

Spock looks away again. Kirk's eyes narrow. _Such a vain creature_ , Spock thinks as he continues to avoid the human's eye. A hand grips his face and turns it.

"Look at me!" The voice is still quiet, but more commanding than before. Spock shivers and longs to disobey, but knows that he won't.

"I loathe you," he whispers, leaning into Kirk's neck. His lips touch the skin and tastes his captain's sweat. It's foul, yet drives him on. His teeth nip the flesh and his ears revel in the sound of Kirk's gasp.

"Liar," Kirk moans and Spock bites harder. There are fingers in his hair now, pulling at the strands and he pulls Kirk closer to him.

"You adore me," Kirk says as they start to rut together. Spock growls, but says nothing as he buries his face deep in the groove of his Kirk's neck. He feels the tip of Kirk's dagger trace it's way up his back.

"You idolize me," Kirk says, his voice like a sigh. At this Spock pulls back, his frown marring the lines of his goatee.

"I despise you," he hisses. "You horrible, vile thing. You are like a leech. You repulse me." He is no longer laying beside Kirk, but on top of him, his knife pressed into his captain's neck and he thinks, _maybe tonight?_

Under him Kirk is no longer smiling. Instead his face is thoughtful and he purses his lips. Slowly, he extends his arm out to the side, carefully dropping his dagger on the side table. Then with both arms he reaches up cupping Spock's face in both hands. He brings his unresisting first officer down for a kiss.

It's slow and soft, and inside Spock feels something melting away. With eyes shut, he lets out a sob and dives in. The kiss becomes harder, more desperate and leaves both men panting. With his eyes still shut, Spock places his forehead to of his Kirk's

"I loathe you," Spock repeats but without any conviction. He feels Kirk's breath on his face and there is a puff of air as the man laughs silently.

"And yet, here you are," Kirk murmurs.

"Always," Comes Spock's reply.

"There was never any doubt of that, Mr. Spock." Kirk's tone is teasing, so sure of what he is saying but underneath there is a hint of something else. Spock names it as relief.

"I suppose not, Captain." Spock intones and he hears another laugh. He finally sets aside his knife and copies his captain, cupping the man's face in his hands. He opens his eyes to stare down into twin pools of gold.

"Damn you," Spock whispers. With his hips and leg he pushes Kirk's legs apart. Under him the Kirk takes the hint and bends his knees. Never taking his eyes off his first officer, Kirk lifts his hips. Spock pauses. His mouth opens to speak, but Kirk runs a thumb over his lips and shakes his head. Spock give the digit a kiss and moves his hips forward.

He enters his captain easily as traces of their previous fucking has left Kirk slick and open. He didn't bother with being slow or gentle. That's not what his captain wants. That's not what he needs. Under him Kirk writhes and mutters under his breath, his eye shut.

Spock growls. "Look at me, James," he rumbles.

Opening his eyes, Kirk gives him a lopsided grin. "Of course," he says.

Spock thrusts. His movements are hard and with each thrust he grunts from the effort. Under him Kirk pants and groans, his eyes hooded and his mouth slack.

Spock pushes in harder, gritting his teeth. "You disgust me, you whore," he says his voice low.

Kirk moans and laughs, lifting his legs to wrap around Spock's waist. His hands are gone from Spock's face as his arms snake around the his neck. "You say the sweetest things to me," he moans.

Spock jerks back from Kirk's embrace. He falls back on the bed and tugs at one of Kirk's arms. Kirk rises to his knees and crawls on top of Spock. Leaning on his hands, Kirk bends down and nuzzles Spock's face.

"Are you gonna let me ride?" Kirk coos, licking the corners to Spock's panting mouth.

"Shut up," Spock orders and Kirk smiles playfully. He positions himself over Spock's cock and slowly lowers himself down on it. He moans as he moves down. Spock fights the urge to grab the human and push him down.

Once seated, Kirk rotates his hips, slowly undulating on top of Spock. Spock hands go to his Kirk's hips, giving them a hard squeeze. With groan, Kirk start to rock back and forth. He watches as Spock's head tilts back and his eye shut. He grins.

"You love me," he whispers and Spock shakes his head.

"Admit it. You have devoted yourself to me. You bask in my shadow. You sing praises to me and say my name like a prayer."

Spock continues to shake his head.

"No. You mean nothing to me. I find you repellant. You are delusional and nothing more than a crazed despot seeking to glorify his own ego."

Kirk lifts up slowly and drops back down in one movement, making Spock bite his lip. He repeats the action only harder. Spock peers up at him as Kirk starts to rock again.

"Then why do you crawl into my bed every night? I don't need to glorify my ego, Spock. You do it for me. You think I don't know those secret words you whisper in my ear with such reverence? You think I'm asleep, but I hear every syllable. Ashaya, k'diwa, t'hy'la. I know them all."

"Fuck you," comes Spock's voice harsh and bitter. Kirk just laughs, the sound merry and far too bright in Spock's ears.

"Every night. Just admit it, Spock. Admit that you love me. That I'm your god and worship me as such. Think of all the blessings I have bestowed upon you so freely."

Spock lays his head back and lets out another groan. Heaven and hell should not reside in the same place and yet for him they did.

"James," Spock's voice cracks as a hand moves from Kirk's hip to his cock. He hears the human swear as his cool fingers grip the shaft and start to milk it.

"Fuck Spock," Kirk hissed. Spock purrs. His fist moves in time with Kirk's hips and together they curse and moan.

Spock comes first , his orgasm like lightning. His muscles bunch up and when they release, his body is slack. With a languid hand, he pushes Kirk off and lazily moves down the stocky frame, taking the hard cock in his mouth.

He moves his tongue around the shaft, his head bobbing along. He turns his eyes upwards and watches as Kirk pants and moans,  his name tumbling over the man’s lip like a prayer. When Kirk finally comes, Spock swallows eagerly as he continues to suck, feeling as some of the semen run from his lips into his beard.

With one last suck, Spock pulls away and sits back on his heels. He stares at Kirk, who is watching him wide eyed and breathless. There is smile and Spock is knocked back as Kirk leaps on top of him.

Warm hands bury themselves in his hair as the human's mouth kisses and licks at his swollen green tinted lips. Wrapping his arms around Kirk's body he hold him tightly, as if for dear life. Kirk only laughs, placing his lips to Spock's ear.

"Admit it," he says again .

Spock sighs. "Yes," Spock starts. "I love you." His tone is full of awe and defeat. Kirk beams victoriously above him. "But only because you love me too."

The smug expression is gone now and Kirk lays still on top of him. Spock says nothing else, but moves his hand through the thick tawny locks and over the flushed face. In the silence they lay there, unsure and frightened.

"You know," Kirk said breaking the silence, "one day..."

Spock nodded. "...You will be my unmaking."

"And you will be the death of me.”

They stare forlornly at each other and without another word move away from one another. Kirk slides off the bed blowing out the candles and steps into the fresher. Spock is left to strip the bed of its soiled sheets and toss them into the recycler. Kirk comes back into the room pink and clean. then it's Spock turn to disappear into the bath, leaving his captain to remake the bed with fresh linens.

Afterwards, they clean each others wounds and crawl into bed. Under the covers, Spock pulls Kirk to him, sighing as the human snuggles against him. They both know that in another universe they are real lovers that care about each other with no strings attached. That they don't use sex and words as weapons. They don't labor to bring the other down, but lift each other up. They both know this and they grieve.

Again Spock sighs as Kirk, already asleep, snuffles quietly. He stroke his captain's hair and kissed his forehead.

"K'diwa," he whispers. "Maybe one day things will be different." Of course, he knows that to be a lie. It would never happen and they will destroy one another, but he would never admit it.


End file.
